No Fear

It's been too long.

For the past several months, I've wrestled with the loss of certain parts of my wardrobe circa 1993, which surprisingly aren't my JNCO jeans that I know instantly came to your mind. Okay I do miss those jeans a little. But for better or for worse, I'm bringing back "No Fear" t-shirts/long-sleeved t-shirts/maybe the huge (and clearly illegal) stickers that rednecks with trucks 6 feet off the ground and cool neon shocks put on their rear window. Seriously, the shocks were great, albeit, secondary to the sticker.

In any case, it's no surprise that the No Fear company was once a huge trend. I mean, come on- the product sells itself. How can anyone not feel like conquering the world when they have NO FEAR?? Their sayings aren't just some clever quip or slogan (see: the highbrow Big Johnson t-shirts of the same era); rather, they're fruits of wisdom, ripe with timeless (though somewhat paradoxical) advice, like "A champion is someone who gets up even when they can't" (although first off- that's incorrect grammar, "they" should be "he/she", and it just doesn't actually make any sense) or, better- "If you're not living on the edge, you're taking up too much space." Side note: In all fairness to people who suck at life, I will say it would be an interesting predicament if everyone was clamoring for the edge, because probably a lot of innocent people with no fear would die in the process. But to be completely honest, I am sick of people who don't live on the edge, because I"m like "Hey man, get away from me with your trying-to-be-hip (hip isn't even a word) Jerry Garcia tie and safe office job- I'm trying to jump my dirtbike over my dad's shed and you're blocking the way." And this is why bringing back the No Fear ideal is necessary.

A war in Iraq? Give me a pair of sai and it'll be over in 24 hours. Maybe 23. Global warming? Psssh...bring on the tidal waves, I'll surf them the whole way to St. Louis and then douse a styrofoam cup in hairspray and burn it just becasue. Hell, if Barry Bonds had no fear, for real no fear, he would take steroids in the dugout, break the home run record, then break Bud Selig's face and anyone else's face that said a word about the ordeal. Is this not the perfect world???

Maybe it'll catch on again, maybe not. I can assure you I'll do my damnedest to try, because it's not the size of the dog in the fight- it's the size of the fight in the dog.